Sometimes I Cry

 Why is it society deems crying as a weakness? Little boys are taught that one criteria to be a man is not to cry. Little girls who cry are labeled as too emotional. It seems shedding tears is frowned upon in the grand scheme of life, however truth be told,  tears are the voice of our emotions.

I tend to cry at the drop of a hat these days. Maybe it is hormones or lack of?  Maybe I am going through the "change" of life? Or maybe, just maybe,  my heart has become more sensitive to the things that surround me? I choose to believe it's the latter. I choose to believe my daddy God has answered my prayer when I asked Him to allow me to see others through His eyes.

Sometimes. I. Cry.

And I'm not alone. 

John 11 verse 35 is only two words. Two heartfelt words.   "Jesus wept."

Scripture allows us to see the depth of His love for Lazarus when He heard of his death. Through his tears we see the voice of his heart, and we hear the sound of his emotions. If Jesus can weep, if He can show his heart for all to see, shouldn't  we?  A few years ago a precious friend  went to his eternal home. The same day he was laid to rest, we found out another childhood friend had passed as well.

 I watched the guys stand there with hands in their pockets while  biting the inside of their cheeks, and doing their best of holding their emotions tight to their hearts.  We, girls, had tissues in hand dabbing the inside of our eyes as if that would stop the flow of tears.  Somewhere between the words spoken, and the lyrics of the songs played, we all allowed our emotions to speak.

We. All. Cried.

I believe Jesus held each of us tenderly in our moments of grief, after all He knows what it feels like.  And whispered ever so lovingly " He is home with me. They both are."   While I grieve for those left behind, knowing my sweet childhood friends are in the arms of Jesus softens my hearts pain.

But how do I  handle my grief for a world that is lost by her own choice; a world that refuses to see God and all that He is?  A world that continues to denounce our creator? When the lies of the enemy have twisted the Lord's truth and ensnared so many into living life in a darkness they believe to be right?   How could I not cry knowing what the eternal outcome will be?   Though my heart cries again and again, I trust my tears are not in vain and I hold tight to the One, the I Am. My daddy God. 

And through my tears one thing remains. My hope in Jesus. He is the anchor my soul is tied to. My heart will have its moments when it is shaken to its core and my tears will fall.  

But I do believe I am not alone. I believe Jesus cries with me.

Today my heart cries for the lost and all those who have lost a loved one; for those who are broken, and those who still are fighting against the truth of God's word.   And in the midst of my tears, I cling to  His promises. My prayer today is for the Lord to hold us all, to wrap us up in His forever love, to give us peace in the midst of our pain and to speak to the brokenness of our hearts.  To give us beauty for our ashes.

Psalm 6: verses 8 and 9

Depart from me, all you workers of iniquity; for the Lord has heard the voice of my weeping. the Lord has heard my supplication; the Lord will receive my prayer.

It's not wrong to cry. 

Jesus cried. 

And sometimes I cry.