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Showing posts from March, 2014

"Walk Away"..... says God

"Walk away little girl"......I hear my daddy God's voice speaking clearly. " This is not what or who I have for you"......... "Do not walk off the path I have set before you"......... "You have come so far, heed my instruction"...... "Walk away".....says God.
"Whew that was close Lord".... I tell him. There are times in life we can get to the point in our waiting period we believe the very thing that has been set before us is ours...... In reality it is not.  It is a diversion off the path set before us...... A snare to hinder our walk..... A trap to stop us from reaching our blessed destination...... A disaster wrapped in a pretty bow, aimed to take us out emotionally.......
A task at hand to have us sell out our birth right (blessing) for a bowl of stew, (the here and now).  ~Remember Esau sold his to Jacob ...Genesis 25:29-34~
Making the same type of decisions and expecting a different out come is unwise..... It is  disastrous ......

Control...Such an illusion

Trying to control someone else choice of words, actions or even thought process,for me, can be compared to a game of tug-a-war. You can dig your feet in, grab hold tight, pull with all your strength and still end up on the ground.

For me, my "ground" time is .........

~SIGH~.   Well , more times than I want to admit......But is a defined reality in my life!

*Control is just an illusion when it comes to other peoples actions and words*

The Lord spoke these to me several days ago and then had me sit on them.

Waiting has never really been one of my best assets in life :)

But waited I did, until now.....

Jesus knows oh so well how my little "control" issues can and have gotten me into a pinch.

Of course I didn't see them as "control" issues. However they were and are. And by His grace I am still a work in process.

My illusions have come in many forms.

If I loved a person enough I could "change" them. ( that can make for bad relationship choices)

If I just …

It Just Clicked..... For Real

I am having the biggest Ah-Ha moment of my life ...... I mean really, it's huge, gianormous, thrilling and a freedom that I have never known!!
I have always tried to be Ms. Fix-It to anyone and everyone I love..... Especially my two girls.  They are my babies; it's my job right?!?
Well.............. Not so much. And with my OCD Ms. Fix-It syndrome, I have allowed myself to be over stressed, over whelmed and become a natural disaster emotionally.  It was my job to a certain point in their lives, to nurture, teach, shape, mold and love them. I was to give them roots and wings....... Apparently it's the wing part that I have had a hard time balancing.
~sheesh~ Forgive me Lord for I know I can be a basket case :)

If one was to ask my girls, they'd probably say I need hormones, but in reality it has been a fear that I did not do my job well enough for them to succeed in the world with out me.
I panic when I see them making  decisions that , in the long run, may be hurtful and damaging..…

I Fall Down......Sharing from Shakin the Foundation

Photo Credit
I fall down...... In my words...... In my actions.......
I fall down in my thoughts...... In my wants..... In my needs....... My intentions.
In my relationships..... Past and present....... I fall down.
Romans 3:23 For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.

To read more, pop over to Shakin' the Foundation


Standing With A Hurting Heart

Forgive me if I ramble.......
So many thoughts and emotions today.

I am trying to remove my flesh from it all....
Impossible on my own,  I know.

I do not like the anger and bitterness that has infiltrated my inner being.....
I feel as though I have iron bars wrapped around me and try as I might, I am unable to remove them.
The hurt cascades over my heart twisting and turning into every crevice like spinney barbs ripping and slashing holes for anger and bitterness to to take up residence .
Then the tears come.......

Watching a loved one struggle can be most heart wrenching....
Feeling their pain on top of my own.......
For me it's like watching a re-run of my past, which only intensifies the hurt.
I have cried out to God asking Him " Isn't my testimony enough??"
"My past mistakes should be more than suffice,  right,Lord??"
"Why??....Just why Lord???"
Silence penetrates my cries, for I already know my answer.....

We all have our own testimony.....
Our own mistakes.…