She Stands

      As a child and even a young adult storms scared me.... It was a eerie type of fear.... A fear that held me captive in my entire being....... It was the unknown power the storm contained... The destruction that lived within it's wall of fiery. I couldn't see past the darkness of the clouds nor could I cling to the  knowledge that the sunshine resided right behind them. As a child my hiding place from a storm was hiding deep within the covers of my bed. As a young adult and married, I would bury my face in my husband's back, wrapping my arms around him tightly with eyes closed so hard one would think my eyeballs had vanished. How many times do we allow the storms in life to consume us? To paralyze us with fear? To hold us hostage with in our own minds? To keep us captive in the confounds of the unknown? Life storms come in many forms. From our finances, to mishaps with our children, to relationships destroyed or an illnes...

      Another birthday is upon me...... Another year older..... A few more gray hairs growing...... ( Nothing a box of color can't fix) Maybe even a few more wrinkles crowning my face. ( Extra face cream to the rescue)   It's been 5 years since my daddy God moved me back to my home state and town.... In these 5 years I've had changes within myself..... Healing, restoration, deliverance and much growth. Looking back over the last 5 years, much has changed in my life..... Changes for the good in me..... For those I am most thankful. I do however have areas in my life that to me seem stagnant.... No change.... Just sitting..... Still waiting.... I tell myself, my time is not God's time and his time is always the right time.... I tell myself He is setting the stage for me... He is preparing me for all He has for me. And then I hear my clock ticking reminding me I will be a year older...... My flesh mocks me.... My mind...

    Years ago I asked the Lord to use me as an instrument of His love. My heart was so full my only desire was to let it spill over in the lives of those who starved to be loved, those who have never had someone love them unconditionally.  I never in my wildest imagination realized there would be times when loving others could be so hard.   Hard when I watch others sit in the misery of their circumstances..... Hard when I hear their words of self pity and constant negativity..... Hard when I see them push away every good thing our daddy God is putting in their path to help them overcome. Hard when I witness their defeat in life by their own choosing. Hard when I see them turn a deaf ear towards words of encouragement ..... Hard when they choose to live in past hurts and pain instead of healing and grace.... Hard when they deny the love of their daddy God.   My heart just breaks a thousand times over for them.... Sometimes t...

    The definition of pain : physical suffering or discomfort caused by illness or injury Injury can be physical and emotional.   We all walk roads of pain at one time or another. Whether it's our own road or one we are walking for someone we love and care for.   Each one is a different based on the circumstances and situations they are going through. Some are self inflicted by their own choices... And some are not. There are roads of pain that come to be simply because someone we love is going through hell and back and we have chosen to walk it out with them. We do so because we love them..... We do so because we have conquered our own road of pain and know how to prevail.   I choose do so because of the unconditional love of my daddy God has given me my entire life, never leaving nor forsaking me.  It is unconditional love is what will bring those I love through the pain, out of the shame and into a ...

    Trust is such a powerful word. In reality it is a powerful emotion. An emotion that can give joy or pain. I have been told my entire life that I trust people way too easy. I believe it's because I do my very best to look for the good in people. I purpose to see others as my daddy God sees them. I don't look to their faults and downfalls in life, for I ,myself, have fallen many times in life. ( many, many times) I see past who they are at that very moment and I see who they are becoming. I see their heart............   My trust issues I have discovered come from a place within myself , a place I thought I had long ago removed...... Thankfully my daddy God continues to mold me, shape me and teach me. In the simplicity of my own little mind, I believed when I prayed and turned a situation over to  my daddy God, I had left it there for him to work on. Sadly that has not been the case.   By allowing myself to...

" He will never be content until he makes me what he is determined I ought to be" - Hinds Feet on High Places When I read that sentence, it stopped me in my tracks..... Literally.  I read it and reread it several times.  For a large part of my life I was an emotional runner. I ran from any pain that came into my world, any rejection and any brokenness. I actual thought if I ran (not deal with it) it would all go away. Wrong............. I  allowed it all to build up inside of me like a huge stone wall.  In doing so I had no room for peace, love and true happiness.  No matter how far or long we run from our giants in life ( rejection, pain, brokenness, anger ) God will continue to chase us until we are so uncomfortable in our own skin that we stop running and surrender it all to him. I became so uncomfortable in my own skin, I got to the point surrendering it all to him was all I wanted to do.  I no longer wa...

 Many times in life we have those who come into our lives only for a season. A season of hope..... A season of encouragement..... A season of healing.......... And even a season of love. Over the course of my life, I have learned that God will place certain people in my life for growth and change. As a woman, we have been created to love, nurture and care for those we love,  to push our own emotions to the side and stand for the ones we love and care for. We have the " I want to save you from all life's pain" syndrome because I love you. Well at least I know I do.  That's just me...... It's how my heart functions. However that part of me, the one who is willing to lay it all down for those I love, can cause myself pain and heart break. Why is that you may ask? It's not because I love them, support them and stand for them..... It's because I allowed my heart to get so wrapped up in the natural that I tried to save them ,...