In lieu of my nations recent tragic events and those that have hit my hometown, I find myself in a place of bewilderment. A place where words do no justice to the pain and grief that seems to have swallowed cities, coummities and the nation as a whole in a place of grief that is larger than I could have ever imagined in my lifetime.
I do not cry from a place of fear. Gods words promise me he did not give me a spirit of fear but of love, peace and sound mind. ( 2 Timothy 1:7) My tears come from a place that shelters my hearts deepest emotions for those I know, those I don't and those whose pain is more than they can bare. It is my secret place where my walls fall and my weeping is earth shattering.
Where I have no words, my tear stained face is deafening to my soul.
My tears have purpose.
" You number my wanderings; Put my tears into Your bottle; Are they not in Your book? When I cry out to You, Then my enemies will turn back; This I know, because God is for me. "
King David wrote this in the book of Psalms as his prayer of relief for those who were tormenting him. We as a nation are being tormented by the enemy of our souls. He comes to divide and conquer. He will use us all , if allowed, as a tool to bring about strife and devastation amongst ourselves. His ultimate purpose is to devour all of Gods children and has no concern how this goal is accomplished. The hatered he has hurled over our nation and around the world has truly brought me to my knees. On bended knees I see how easy the weakness of my flesh would have me to raise my battle sword from a place of anger. It is when I see the fight before me through the eyes of God I see it in truth and with wisdom.
" For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood but against principalities, against powers, against rulers of the darkness of this age, against spirtual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places.
I have being thinking a great deal about Jesus and His time praying in the garden before He was captured and the unimaginable agony He felt.
And being in agony , He prayed more earnestly. Then His sweat became like great drops of blood falling to the ground.
He knew the cup He was about to drink from, the cup in which He drank for us all. I have often wondered does he feel the agunish in my own tears, in the tears of our nation and those who surround us. I ask Him with a hope filled whisper and the words that come softly back.....
" This I know, because God is for me."
Society paints a picture of a God who has abandoned His children. A God they deem to be the author of the brokenness and turmoil the nations face today. Modern technology has become a key device for the enemy to destroy the vitality of the body of Christ. However time and time again my daddy God, our God, has proven what the enemy has meant for evil, He ( God) has turned to good for those who love Him.
And we know that all things work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.
I think Tyler Perry said it best when he stated these words. "To first believe and only then can you truly see."
Even though my tears may fall, my heart may hurt and my soul grieves.....
I believe every tear I cry He places in a bottle. Each one is accounted and tenderly cared for by His grace and unconditional love.
Not one goes unnoticed nor is ignored and He hears my heart with each one that falls.
My tears have a purpose~